Need something special?

Once apon a time there lived a little princess- she was a hardworking one though- one with a dream but no wishes- she had to make it happen! The little princess worked day and night to achieve her dream and slowly but surely she is getting there- THE END! (Nooot)

Ok so the little princess met a little prince- it was perfect- he was as hard working as her and loved the world of fashion too! It was so perfect in fact that the two got married!!! They have the most magical little workshop outside Harare- a team- 4 strong- manage to produce all of what I am about to show you!

Ok thats the one I dream about like- all the time! They are so stunning- and the inside is just as fab as the outside!

They have the most stunning colours- my sling will be a purple one! :)

This little prince and princess have the most amazing design sense- how stunning are these bags- they should be on the red carpet!

So if you don't have a Tana bag- go get one! And if you are oversea's email me zimsocialite@yahoo.com and we can see what we can do!

PS 14 Aintree Road, Highlands, Harare.

xoxo

Happy Weekend!!!

Shuff-ff-ffling The END....

One more quote from that night:

Ladybird: "Where the hell are we?" - Tatty! :)

So the next day as usual we have our amazing brekkie (Its literally the meal of the day), and decide to head off to Lomagundi to join the rest of the crew. This was the beginning of the END!
So we are on our way, Shuffling to some LMFAO when Green Leader says: "Knight Rider I may need five minutes"! Yes he was very ill- that blinking 'off' wors I say...... (Mmmmm). Prior to the chanda GL had thought it wise to hook his car keys onto his pant... Not the best idea as I am sure this is where he lost them. So now poor GL is feeling like he will meet death and has now lost his, wait his mates car keys- and to make it worse the car is an automatic central locking thing!

Regardless we all sat around a concrete table at the pool and played a game of- The Stupidest Game in the World!
Rules:

• You had to call each other by the nicknames given.
• You could not move from the table. A shot of vodka was your fine if you needed the loo.
• And we played those alphabet games- the loser not being allowed to eat for the rest of the day!!!!!!!!

We had to tap out- it was going one way- some of the 'mature' members of the crew went back to Charara with such excitement- WE WERE GETTING A BOAT! One afternoon is better than nothing!

So of goes GL to get the boat in Knight Riders car- it was taking a little longer than anticipated but we didn't even notice- we sat in The Fridge (The best room ever) and had some DMC's! FINALLY the boat arrives and off we go:

GL (Now sitting in boat when we arrive): KR I am so sorry but I crashed you car. (Your Dad's car)
KR: ha ha ha- you joking!
GL: No serious bra- I crashed it.
KR: F*#k- serious?
GL: Yes seriously- I've been chemsing- so sorry.

Stop right now and just think about GL's day- talk about 'When it rains its pours!'

Anyway the sundowners were amazing- try 6 boats tied up and about 30 people- only in Zimbabwe!!! It was awesome! It was about at this time Knight Rider started turning into the squeeze!
Our last night was quite a poor effort- but given there had been NO holding back up to this point its quite understandable... We played some relaxed 30 seconds and sipped on the wine- I had heart burn for the next 3 days!

Well as you can all tell I am sure- it was a legendary tour and i just CANNOT wait for the next one!

And it is my pleasure to announce that The Squeeze was not killed on his arrival to his Dad's house as he reversed up the driveway so he would have a few seconds to explain!

xoxo

Joke of the day:

Q: What do you get when you cross a bulldog and a giraffe?


A: A dog that can bite people over the wall!

Shuff-ff-ffling Part two!

So for part two- so after we had had our massive breakfast we decided to hit the supertube at Carribia! "Did you know that Superman was born in the supertube?"- quote compliments of The Bop... As you do in Kariba- we started drinking at about 10- actually maybe even earlier. I let everyone get about an hour ahead of me- the reason being- as much as I think I can- I am no good at handling booze!
So with our supertube effort done- we headed home, plus two! Not just any two- two smalls. Yes 10 drunken fools and two children, but it forced us to eat as we had to feed them anyway. So there we are enjoying the delisoicness of chicken and off borie rolls- when who walks in?? DES- he walks in and just sits down with us!!!!


Des: "What up, what up- man its so effing hot hey"
Squito: "Ummm, well why are you wearing a jacket?"
Des: "Well how else can I carry my shit around" (Like his torches and stuff I think)


VERY AWKWARD SILENCE


Des: "So there is a thumping party on tonight in town"
The Crew: "Cool"


Another awkward moment


Des: "Please holla if you go to the thumping party."
Crew: "OK"  (Awkward)


He then jumps up and walks through our house- WTFFFFFFFFF??????? Not strange at all!


It was so way wierd we decided to go to the point and wait for the arrival of Ladybird, 50 and Johnny Blaze.. Well we were so zoned out- until they arrived- it was like a new lease of life! We stayed on the point till the sun went to sleep again and then off we went back to the cabin:


To play some EXTREME 30 SECONDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Game One:

Left vs Right side of the table.

Winners: Gaga, The bop, Mos, Knight Rider, Squito

Report: There was a lot of in team fighting- sibling rivalry maybe? There was also a lots of shouting the wrong answers, accustations and cheating! The winners got off to a slow start but took the lead in the last 2 block stretch...

Quotes:

• "Jesus was in it"- silence-"Like the book" = Bible
• "Well we won ok, we won- so F*#K OFF" = This from the 'quiet' little Mos!

Game Two:

Every second person was in your team- thus seperating siblings- which seemed like a good idea.

Winners: TFCD's: 50, The Bop, FOMO, Squito and Mos

Report: To figure out who would get the first go we had to come up with the most DISGUSTING name we could think of- it was tough but TJCC's took it hands down- but let me just say things are not looking good for us with redemption day coming up... Specially Green Leader actually- GL developed a new tactic:

Mos: "No we got THREE"

GL Shouts: "Who the eff, what the eff, etc"

Mos: Speechless

Squito: Spilt half her drink and raaannnn!

It was so hilarious, Green Leadre is so chilled- but when he wants to be cheeky- watch out! (It was for realzies though- just tactics)

Next attempt at a tactic was 50- "The african country?" Us: "Angola" 50: "Yes"

The Protector smelled a rat- she takes the card to examine- no Angola! She knows him too well!

Quote:

50: "It ryhmes with shashishormia"...................(The answer will be at the bottom)

Anyway the game came down to a sudden death where the opposite team could choose who read- we did not even have to discuss- Knight Rider was the one, but what shocked me was that the other team chose me sha! I always thought I was quite good! Anyway KR got an outstanding 1- and we took the trophy!

I will just say one thing- 30 seconds as extreme as this takes it out of you- we had to get out of the house and to the disco- we are now souupped..

We need to disco dance! And what better place to do it that at Long Bar? The chicks were loving this plan- the guys, not so much! So they drive around as if they are going to another party- expecting a reaction! But alas we were happy with the chair, the drink and the "thumping" music. Our only error was- we only had one drink! So shortly after our arrival we had to treck back to the cabin, reload the drinks, convince the guys and grab the beginning of the end- a bottle of Amarula.

So off we all go- the chicks immediately hitting the D-Floor and the guys hitting the bar (As in just to sit on it). We get treated to The Protectors lap dance- on the FOMO! Too hilarious! I almost hung up my dancing shoes for good!

Well the next thing we get a message that we are leaving and the guys are raging!!

50: They accused us of stealing.

The Protector: What? Who? I am going to sort this out now!

50: Just leave it!

TP: No ways- this place always causes shit.

50: Get in the car- we are leaving!

Squito: No Lets go flatten them!

Piled into the car!

TP: You ARSEHOLES (SHOUTING)

Squito: Assssss hoooooollesss (Squeaking)

TP: You IDIOTS (Shouting)

Squito: You sweaty ball sacks! (Squeaking)

So we get home and someone turns to the guys:

"So did you guys steel?"

Guys look around with confused looks- "Did anyone steal??" Ha ha- but no they didn't- they couldn't!

Moral of the story?

Don't take bottles of stuff to parties and drink it on the dance floor- when there are only 5 of you on the dance floor!

So with no place to go- we had to make the most of the cabin and we resorted to a game of Catastrophic Hik Hak Hok (Some strange people call it Ching Chong Cha)

Rule- You can pull any sign you want- and the most amazing weapon wins!

Laybird: Grenade I think (Pulling a fist)

50: A genei (Open hand indicating the rubbing of a lamp)

Squito: Atomic Fart (Like that sign you pull in that punching game)

Knight Rider: Dog (The dog sign you pull when you are making a dog shadow on the wall)

Fomo: Had lost it- she could not stop laughing- "Who the ef pulls a dog signs after an atomic fart?"

Sorry i have to stop there again- so to be continued...............

xoxo

Answer: California

Shuff-ff-ffling Part One

All I can say is the past 10 days have been possibly the best ever! And guess how many days leave I took?? 4!! Gotta love April in the place. So lets talk about spontaneity- my plans for going to Mozam all came together on Thursday- I left Friday- I am literally just through the boarder on the way home (5pm) and I get a call that we are leaving for Kariba at 6am the next day! I get home at 9 unpack- rinse bikini- repack- sleep for a few hours and hit the road again. I think it best I break this story into sections, I will start with Kariba because of my rapidly failing memory...

The Crew:

The Bop,
Gaga (Aka The Blonde BF)
Green Leader ( Due to his case of major greens from the'off wors')
Mos (I'm Squito she's Mos)
Ladybird (Actually a big strong male- but it suits him)
Miss FOMO (Last one awake every night)
The Protector (For wanting to flatten people)
Knight Rider (With a silent K, also The Squeeze)
ToHH (The only Homophobic Homo)
50 (Like the cent)
Johnny Blaze

The Drive:

After waking up at 4am to get to The City- to get booze at the 24 hour Arundel Spar (or not- they just change it to normal and dont let us know), we finally leave at 7- in the sexiest black Vigo! Not to drive to Kariba- but to fly to Kariba! if it wasn't for the toll gates I think we would have made it there in 2 hours- which made for a nice change to out mozam drive the day before- averaging a incredible speed of about 50k's an hour!

• I need to commend the Bop on his incredible talent to drink Savanah! I would have 'seen death'
• But the Savanah may have been the cause of his brilliant idea to get two hunnies to flash! The Bop to ToHH quote- "I like hooter- you like hooter lets get them to flash"- so we over take- slow down- The Bop shows some nipple which means 'now you show some nipple'- us three girls in the back are now hiding on the floor- ToHH tries to have a look- thus pulling the car into the next door car- which we then discover is being driven by the girls father! Goooood one!! They also then pull into Makuti- I was so sure we were going to get followed- and given hidings! We had to park at the top to avoid confrontation..
• We arrive only to find the keys are only in Chinoyi- so we head off to 'the town'- on the way- we take a wrong turn- reverse onto a main road (well almost- we hit the curb just before). Got stopped by cops-no wait- we didn't stop- we went straight through........and then stalled!

Eventually the keys arrive so we head back to meet up with everyone and get to the point for some soup and stuff (Johnny was there) wait for the sun to go to sleep and head back to Charara- the third car had arrived- lets call her The Vehi-icle- carrying the Green leader and Knight Rider. Well talk about being on a different level- and there is nothing like a first impression! Thank goodness I had a whole weekend to redeem myself! And that is how long it took!

Night one:

There is a disco at Long Bar- we must go! In amongst a whole heap of memory loss I have one:
Walking down the road with Mos, Gaga and The Bop- and there he is- he was clearly born to save lives- its Des! "Just be careful" he hollas "There are man eating Hippo's roaming this land- in fact it is too dangerous- I must escort you"- we walk slowly but surely- "there it is" shouts Des- pointing his torch at big ass pot plant in the distance! WTF! But we managed to get escourted all the way back too- Des was even kind enough to stop and fetch his stronger torch- we tried to take advantage and escape- but he came out with a maussive torch- we were like deer in the headlights! I am not sure how long a lasted after the 'experience' but I think I took the fact that my top lip had stopped working as a good time to hit the sack!!

Do you know what I love about Kariba- the lack of hangovers- whether its because you sweat your hangover out while you drink, or the altitude or maybe you dont get a chance to hang- I love the way you wake up feeling about 70%- in Harare it would be about a 10%...

I woke up- after having top lip failure and managed to eat a big brekkie- have a cup of coffee etc.. it was awesome!

To be continued..........

PS All our meat had melted and could not be refrozen- tragedy!

xoxo

To all of you in a land lock!!

Ok so as you read I am lounging on the beach at Rio Savane! So I thought I would just write a pre blog about what an amazing time I am having- at this very moment I have a Hunters in one hand and a smokie treat in the other! :)
I also took it apon myself to get some pics:

This is very similar to where I am right now, except where I am the palm tree's aren't browning:



This is how cool i make smoking look (Yes I wear lipstick on the beach)...



Here we have me! Yes, I tan that quickly- and its also amazing how fast hair grows when you are at the beach...

Jokes more like this:

Bitter! Ha ha ha

Imagie I have found love and I am doing this as you read (buterflies!):

Hope ouy are all having fun- and have a cracker of a night planned! I love this time of the year- I am away for like 10 days and I only took 3 days leave! Ef yesssss!

xoxo

Hands.....

If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we're all OK
And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won't be made useless
I won't be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear

My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

Don't judge- you don't know what people have been through- or what good they have been doing.


Poverty stole your golden shoes
It didn't steal your laughter
And heartache came to visit me
But I knew it wasn't ever after
We'll fight, not out of spite
For someone must stand up for what's right
'Cause where there's a man who has no voice
There ours shall go singing

Don't take your life for granted- you have a lot more than most- and that most are happier than you!

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
I am never broken



It is so easy to make someones day.



In the end only kindness matters
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
We are never broken

I am sure she has smiled since and I dont even want to know what she went through! How many hugs did she get?

We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's mind
We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's heart
We are God's eyes
God's hands
God's eyes
We are God's hands
We are God's hands



You will be ok- even when you feel like you won't! Time is a good healer- as is friendship.



Phantom Fog...

I used to get major phantom hangovers at Uni when I missed any night- but I so thought I had grown out of it! Well I haven't- last night I went home as planned- cuddled with the Little Dog as planned- and work on my presentation for this morning (Yes I work well under pressure). I woke up this morning- I had dry mouth and my voice was croaky! What the hell, and I had to present to 25 people about body language, voice tone etc! But at least I did not smell of booze! But I did good! Cracked a few knee slappers- well I found them funny!! The other 25 just looked at me...
In any case I would rather have the phantom one than the real one like below:

In fact I dont know- because when you feel like that at least you know you had an awesome time with your mates!!! So I conclude I would rather have a real smelly hangover than a phantom- because at least you achieved something- and when you have self control like myself- you know it won't be too bad!
I have since been to the hairdresser- I LOVE going to the hairdresser- they play such awesome music- you get a head massage- and you get to hang around cool people! I am sure I am cool enough to be a hairdresser!! Anyway- while I was there I got wind of a hair show coming up- at Axiom! And my hair cut is so cool I get to wear one of their shirts! Whoop whoop!! So the other part of this story is for the men------ the hair models will be in lingerie!! So its perfect- the ladies will go to 'ooohhh aaahh' over the hair and the men to ''ooohhhh aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah' over the boobs and stuff! Its a win win!

PS its on the 7th- will keep you posted!

Well kids- I am off to Mozam tomorrow- efff yaaa!!! I am so excited to see The Family! I am going to teach my nephews to say "ass hhhhhhooooooooole"- like in meet the Fockers- I have been trying for a while but i feel these few days of alone time might be what I need- I will get a video if they do! (I so should have been a teacher)....

I have some pre done blogs that will come out so don't think I'm abandoning you!

xoxo

PS What i would do if I was here:

Friday- Its obvious- Honeybear, Tinroof and maybe TJ's later.
Saturday- I would go to polocrosse in the afternoon to watch- followed by a massive jump up.
Sunday- Probably the same as Saturday- unless HB is having a nice chilled Sunday luch..
Monday- RECOVER

Have you paid your RENT??

Last night I went on a girlies night to Reps Theatre to watch RENT. It was so awesome- quite intense! I have so much respect for the actors/actresses there- they all have full time jobs as well as putting on these amazing performances- and if you can remember in the 'old' days at school- when it was play time it was the best time of the year! We used to miss sport, class, choir etc, and the 'mainest' part I ever got was in my house play at Peterhouse when I had to ring a bell and shout "TTTIIMMEE'. Do you know how nervous I was just to shout "TIIMMEE'- so nervous in fact I forgot to swallow my spit so had to stop half way through- 'TTTIII (Swallow) MMMEEEE'!
But my point is- even those measly productions took so much time- and these people do that and work! WTF- and then they breeze onto the stage- never forget a line- and sing like angels!
Aaaahhh speaking of angels- Angel was my favorite person in the play- he was a tranny- and he rocked the trannyness! I wept when he passed away- especially because apparently I missed one of the most important lines in the whole script- that Angel had AIDS- so when he started dying- I turned to my friend- devastated- "Whats wrong with Angel?", "Why Angel?"," Lets leave- I can't watch with no Angel!"- you should have seen me cheer when he came on with the cast at the end!!
So if you can- try go and see RENT...

These are some of my favorite moments:

• When The Friend with the Nice Boobs burst out laughing at totally at the wrong moment! (She was laughing at the way the guy ran)
• Watching all the old people when a white boy and black girl kissed.
• As above but when two men were about to kiss- the faces were hilarious.
• The street people- they were so funny! When they sang something about Santa Coming and did the actual wanking motion! My type of humor!
• I am like a kid- I loved it when they said the ef word- made me giggle (I hid it because I am trying to be mature)
• And I loved the fact that I was sitting behind two hotties- and then i was too shy to even look at them at interval.

Ok well have a good hump day people- I will not be going out tonight- I am going to cuddle the little dog and eat chocolate while I watch 'She's out of my League" for about the 10th time! (It gets funnier- I am going to call my kid Stainer- in the hope he turn out as funny as Stainer)

Enjoy Tin Roof!

xoxo

If you feel like dancing???

So that beautiful steed that I was telling you about in my last blog- she's gone to horsie heaven after 11 years of being my partner in crime and I'm devastated! So I am going to try my best to tell you about the fun I had prior to the accident but as you can imagine- my sense of funnyness is very mild at the moment.

This is what not to do if you feel like dancing!

Do not leave a perfectly good brai early to go to TJ's when you know everyone is going to Tin Roof- even if your shoes, legs and Skin tell you otherwise! You will walk in- be shocked that these children are even out- don't get a drink- get a JUG!! Now its time for a dance off with the Skin and not only do I lose but I have little children copying me- not in a good way! In a - "ha ha look at that granny dancing" kind of way! Luckily I only found out about it afterwards or else I would have sat on them or something!

So, dance off done- the DJ doesn't even know the songs that I am asking for- thats how old they are- and now we have a JUG!!!!! Brainwave- I lost the dance off- but a down down, now that I am good at!! So I won that- but walked out of there with that mouth full of warm saliva (You know the one- prior to the upchuck).... NOT COOL! But I handled it well- as I do, and off we went to Tin Roof- for the normal deboutury (SP I know- but I can't find the real spelling!). The lessons:

• Zim men don't get fashion- as if I would wear fellies!! They are cute little boots ok!
• Sometimes its good to take the truth option- dares can make for a bad first impression! Specially when they are cute boys. Thanks Skin
• Men are actually more emotional than women- in love after one week? I thought that only happened in the movies!

I then had to play polocrosse- which is not easy on that bad a hangover- so I have made a rule- BEER only on tournament weekends! I lost- and I hate losing!!! So on Saturday I had a beer only night for the first time ever- and beer never tasted that good! I think it was because the dance floor was just on the ground- so breathing in dust made me sooooo thirsty that even I enjoyed beer!

Here is one of the polocrosse guys lying on the dancefloor! Just thought I would let you know what you missed out on!

For those of you who haven't been to a polocrosse party let me educate you! A polocrosse party is where you go when you want to dance, drink and act like a complete monkey- why? Because everyone there is doing the same- and you know there is always going to be someone more monkeylike than you- in this case it was My Friend with The Nice Boobs and we had a new entry- The Worm! The Pommy friend also got off to a late start but her personality shone through in the end when she rugby tackled innocent little DJ Me! In any case it was a brilliant night and I think we managed to raise about $2000 for Shan over the weekend! (Total estimation though)- so it was so worth it! I hope it helps in Shan's quick recover- I need my coach!

So another lesson that I learnt this weekend is not to miss the Party Bus! Gutted!!! Next time...

If you feel like doing something cool tonight?? Rent is on at Reps- apparently its brilliant! I haven't been to Reps in like forever- so excited

xoxo

Lets make some money!

Oh I love the weekend! I love and live for it actually! - ok so that was me trying to be excited! I have flu and I can barely breathe so at the moment all I am is bleak! I have tried so hard to cure it- when I first felt it coming I went to the doc and got an antibiotic- some call it hypo- I call it proactive- nipping the problem in the bud! Well it didn't work!!! I even tried to drown it- Fail. Smoke it out- Fail! So now I am left wheezing- its byatiful! But none the less I only have one life so it better just step aside- its messing with the wrong person!!

So onto the weekend- I have lost so much fitness since I moved from TJ's to Tin Roof coz I haven't danced! I need to dance or else I keep all that pent up energy in me and it makes me act like a knob! So this weekend I am dedicating myself to the Art of Dance. Tonight I intend on going to Tin Roof for a bit of a warm up- and then onto TJ's- bugga the lighties- they must move out the way for the wheezer!! I am limiting myself to about 5 units (Vodka 1, coke 1/2, Zappa 1- I make up my own units and the grading can change at any time).
I then have polocrosse tomorrow- look for me- I will be perched on the most beautiful steed in all the land (seriously she's hot) and people will be screaming for me! (I hired them :)) Then on Saturday night we have the first of our many polocrosse bendas (I am shaking I am so excited!). I love these parties because its ok  to act like a fool because everyone is! But this is a very special party- it is to raise funds for Shan Burbrige- a very special friend who had a very bad riding accident- he is doing so well and is just the most amazing and dedicated man I have ever known, but he still has a lot of recovering to do! So please please come and support the cause whilst having a major benda! There will be a DJ and nice big tent and dancefloor, food and of course lots of booze and shooters!! Oh by the way- its at Ruwa Country Club- at the most you will travel 25km's- which is so not bad- i do it every day!

So I would give her and her horse like a 5/10 and Lady and myself- like a 9/10- just to give you an idea of what to look out for! And I won't be wearing that much clothing- what a prude!

So I guess that it from me for now- I have no doubt I will have LOADS or stories on Monday!

xoxo

PS For you zimbo's who know the meaning- I used the word benda to my friend in UK:
She replied: 'Is a benda when you have sex on a horse!' WTF!!
Ha ha ha I thought that was the funniest thing I ever heard!

To go or not to go???

Sean Kingston is coming to town! (Yes the real one silly).. and man do I love his music! It makes my body gyrate in ways I didn't know possible! Like a trance! I know all his songs and all the words! (ahh no! Now singing electronic music music music) But I just don't know if I trust this country to hold a proper concert! The last time I tried one I had a VERY VERY near death experience, The AKON Concert- and this is how it went:

The Journey:

26 Zimbabwean youths (Yes I still classify myself as one thank you) piled in the back of a 100 ton rig. (Ok thats a lie I am not sure on tonnage. (what a strange word))- and this truck was pimped up!! Some sort of closed sides, hay bales all around, eskie's lining the floor and of course almost the whole Dukes sound system blaring! We were off!! Like animals- screaming, banging the sides, banging the floor and of course taking soouupp! We had one Akon song- ONE- FRREEEEEEDDDOOOOMMMM!! I didn't know the words but I belted out whatever came to my mind! With a trip like this- it was going to be a gooooooooood night!

The Gate:

We arrive- the vibe is ELECTRIC! We were dancing in the car park- having some more bevies when we saw the crowd starting to migrate! My Airport Me took over (I have to be at the front, I have to be first at the baggage claim- I turn animalistic! I will even knock over old people to get there..) so there i was running up a gigantic hill- but its too late! The queue is redic! But the Airport Me can do this- so I make my own queue! It worked- but one of our men fell in battle! $600 of the big ones stolen out his pocket and I think he took some fist! NOT COOL!

The Show:

So we go in our gate and off we go down to the field thing! The excitement is too much! I am immediately 10 times more drunk than I actually am! My Pretty Blonde friend and I then notice that the only thing separating us ($50 section) to golden circle ($100) is a shitty piece of black plastic! We can do this!!! So off we go- under the plastic and then to sprint! We both got caught and tossed back out- but what we didn't realise was that the only thing separating the $15 section and us- was shitty black plastic!!! These people had bush telegraph to the tee- they all just pushed- SNAP- and we were stampeded! It was like running of the bulls but more savage! Beef Dog even ran the shoes off her feet- and had to leave them! So now we are surrounded by $15 people! Ef it mannnnn- but lets enjoy hey! So we start dancing- make a few $15 friends! We were lucky enough to see the "amazing" Winky Dee (Yes seriously thats his name- what a rock star).. Slowly but surely people went back up to the stands- all but 4! I had to see Sean Paul (His music also makes me jirate). Well (and this is not an exaggertion) he came on at 12! It was meant to be 8! And believe me when I say the crowd was helluva restless- and when I say they PUSHED- they effing pushed! Us 4 lone soldiers were separated before we could even say bye! So there I was- lost in a sea of $15 people! I was in tears- but God saved me- he sent two little Indian men- they picked me up and carried me out the jungle! I hugged them so hard I may have broken their ribs! It was now 1am and still no AKON- "Screw this" we said- over and out! We were by the gate- Akon comes on! I ran so fast my legs were a blur to me- I had to see Akon- $50 to see Winky- no thanks! Well he was a dot- and I had puffy eyes! Home time!

The bottom line is I dont think I can do it all over again! It was a once in a lifetime experience- but not like the good type- but then again look at the story I got out of it! http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/zim.socialite
Please let me know if you think I should go!! :) Even if its just for a report!

This is how Sean makes me boogie!!

Akon was the polar opposite to this:

Have a good Thursday!!!

xoxo

The Acorn

The mighty oak:

Was once a small nut that stood its ground:

I am having an emo day- I guess it happens when you want something but there is nothing you can do to get it! I know it goes against the saying in every way possible! I am fighting- but its like an acorn trying to fight a full grown oak! maybe a David and Goliath story coming- lets hope!

In any case- I love this saying- and thanks to Deli for telling it to me! :) I think we should all think of that little nut when we are having a bad day!

xoxo

PS Thanks for reading my blogs! :)

In a rush much??

I rush- I rush everywhere! But on this occasion I was not rushing because I wanted to, I was rushing because I had to- I don't do being late- specially not for meetings! So there I was hurtling down Borrowdale road- shiiiit- speed trap- screech my wheels (Which is not obvious at all) and tootle innocently passed the cops! Vooooooooooooooooooommmmmm I'm off again! I get to Churchill and hook a left, and this is what i see:

 Aaaaahhhh balls!! You know sometimes you get these little cars that can actually shunt! Not this little one- not at aaalll!!!

Oh wait- this was fast for this little bugga- shortly after this he screeched his wheels for about a 5x5cm 'pothole'!
You have no idea how relived I was to reach the new round about! I undertook him- not that thats hard- he could have comfortably traveled on the cycle track!

Have a good day!

xoxo

The stunningness of Babwe....

Apparently a few blogs back I really offended some people so I just wanted to start by saying how awfully sorry I am. I never realised how an innocent word could be made into something derogatory. So ya sorry- but I can't say I won't do it again!


FRIDAY NIGHT LESSONS:

• Buckets are better... (But keep them by your side)
• Dont dance on the table in a little dress! Oh and thanks to my mates for leaving me to do it- leading to a stranger having to tell me to step away from the table!!
• Zim needs two bars- the Roof was soooo packed!! Which makes my actions waaay more embarrassing.
• I can stand on one leg and put my finger on my nose at any time of the night, I therefore think I am sober and drink more! (Yes I do tests on myself) But I have now trained myself at this one so its no longer a true reflection of my state!
• I am helluva talented at putting myself in the crapiest situations! I am now hanging my boots up and sticking to myself and My People- incase I get my head scissor kicked off my body!

This weekend was dedicated to family- I am now a Fairy Godmother! I am so happy- and I am going to be the coolest one that ever lived!!! The first thing I have to do is try and get my godson to love me- instead he walks passed me, points, greasies me (The meanest greasy ever) and says- 'I don't like you!'. I have tried everything- saying it back, bursting into tears and negotiating a truce- he will have none of it! Not only that- I wore a frock, a little purple one- and he still looked at me and said "you are not a girl"! (Its the short hair and flat chest I think). Anyway- we do have our cuddly moments- few and far between but they worth it.

We had the family christening at Bushman Rock- it is so stunning- I took some snaps for you! If you are ever looking to get out of town for a bit- take your lady somewhere special check this out:

There is also plenty of game out there- so you can go on game drives, game rides, learn some polo and of course there is 'the dam'! It is just so picturesque- you must go! Call 0712365392 for more info!

Over that day.....

Pheeww- I am so glad yesterday is over! I have never been in such a foul mood in my whole life! Of course only having a couple of hours of sleep doesn't help- in fact it is probably the cause of the mood! No wait!! It was just the losers...

As i said on Facebook Tin Roof once again rocked- it was a bit of a different crowd this time- quite a bit older- like say 35ish- which is an awesome thing because now I know I don't have to grow up for quite a while! So like I said in my last blog my night started with a fabulous dinner at The Friend with a Laughs house- it was sooooooo delish!! Green Thai curry, spring rolls and many a drinkie! With a start like that this was going to be a good night! Stomach lined, My Friend with Nice Boobs and I set off for the Roof! Excitement off the charts- I am addicted- so much so that I get a back to school feeling when I have to leave- unluckily for MFWNB- she ends up sleeping in my car!!! Bwa ha ha! Sorry MFWNB- I promised I would stop paying people to convince you to stay longer and I stuck to that! :)

I think the turning point was with TFWL and the Pommy friend arrived! The Pommy friend is just way to funny- I clearly remember her modeling along the bar- grabbing the back of a chair- flicking her hair and shaking her ass and modeling back!!! WTF- I had to try- but I had to do something even more awesome- I am not telling you what I did, but I thought I was pretty cool! She looks at me- as in a 'what the hell was that' look- and off she goes again! This went on for a while- I retired- The Pomm has wayyyyy to many moves!

So these are some of my lessons:

• Lining the stomach only prolongs the all fall down- which in turn means much less sleep!
• Zambucca is the devil! But so awefully tasty!! They should make a Zambucca flavoured Super Moo.
• Do not drink a shooter that consists of Apple Sourz and Amarula- it is the MOST revolting thing I have ever tasted- its like rotten milk with lumps of flour in it!
• Worst pick up line EVEEEERRRRRRRRRRRR! I am such a knob!

I look, I see and I walk on over! Its two guys- I know neither of them:

Me: Hi is you name Ant?? (Breaking the ice with The Not Hot one)
NHO: No, sorry.
Me: Oh ok you look like someone I know.
(I then stand there arbly)
Me: What you guys up to.
Hot one: Having a few drinks.
Me: (The penny drops that I am an actual idiot) Have a nice night!

FAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I would be so embarrassing if I met and actual famous person- I met a guy who looked like Daniel Radcliff:

          Me: Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyyyy (Very squeaky)
          DR: No I'm Tom..
          Me: But you have an American accent and you look like him.
          DR: I come from America.
          Me: Are you sure you aren't Danny and you just needed a break so you are hiding out in Zim??

And so it went on- and I can go on! I called him Danny the whole night!

• Eros (Greek God): he was often shown as a beautifully-formed, full-grown man.... I think I know him.

So its Friday- hoorrraaaaayyy for Fridays! The plan so far is to go to Honeybear- I miss Honeybear- Followed by some Tin Roof! Who can make these sorts of prediction at this time of day, but thats is the plan.

On Saturday I am off to the lovely Bushman Rock- I am being made a God Mother of the cutest, naughtiest little boy in the whole world! I am so excited!! There is of course, the Cricket World Cup- so no doubt Saturday is going to be awesome! Tin Roof will be screening the game on their big screen, followed by a jump up, and this week Honeybear will be doing something special: A fundraiser, its $5 to get in, there will be specials on their food, shooters girls as well as a live music! Whoop whoop!! So I might have to just do both- one half, one half...

For now thats me!
Have a fantastic weekend- be safe!!

xoxo